THE LAWS OF GOLF (part 1)
No matter how bad your last shot was, you should have Inner peace
knowing that a worse one is yet to come. (This law does not expire on the
18th hole, since it has the supernatural tendency to extend over the course of
a tournament, a summer and, eventually, a lifetime.)
Your best round of golf will be followed almost immediately by your
worst round ever. The probability of the latter increases with the number of
people you tell about the former.
Brand new golf balls are water-magnetic. (Though this cannot be proven
in the lab, it is a known fact that the more expensive the golf ball, the greater
its attraction to water. Expensive clubs have been known to be partly
made with this most unusual natural alloy.)
Golf balls never bounce off of trees back into play. If one does, the tree is
breaking a law of the universe and should be cut down.
No matter what causes a golfer to muff a shot, all the playing partners must
solemnly chant "You looked up," or invoke the wrath of the universe.